By: Oliver Damascus

In reply to Erin. Everyone else is wrong because Spock. No, but actually the only Trek series I can't really get into (besides the one of which we do not speak) is DS9. Also my parents were/are hardcore nerds and we watched TNG and Voyager together when I was wee. Captain Picard forever, man. And Geordi and Data and Q and Guinan. It's too bad that pretty much every single other character annoys the shit out of me. Troi: pansy ass cliché of a terrible therapist. Worf: the "badass" character that is pretty much the opposite of badass, and also kind of sexist. Dr. Crusher: cloying and kind of...prissy? Plus that episode with the True Love with the host/symbiote alien and then basically having sex with Riker which honestly seems a lot more awkward/on my list of "not a line to cross ever Ever" than trying out the gay sex at least to see if the relationship still works, man that episode bugged me. Wesley: duh, awful, go back to the academy. Riker: just go away and stop being pompous and undermining and ugh. Yar: okay actually I miss her. I just can't, you know. Whereas TOS...ah, the classic. See, I can sit through badly executed/problematic/dumb storylines and campy dialogue and terrible special effects/props/scenery if I love the CHARACTERS. And oh, how I love them. Every one. Well. Not Nurse Chapel. But she's better in fic I swear! (Like Dawn Summers in that way. I mean, there's really nowhere to go but up with those characters.) Plus, UR slash ship. Plus, Bones. Plus, George Takei. Plus, hilarious strategic shirt-ripping in every other episode. Plus, (often unsophisticated, but whatever) philosophical exercises thinly masked as plots. Plus, SO MANY TROPES. Plus, Vulcans. Plus, Amok Time. Plus, reboot. Plus plus plus. On the other hand, Captain Picard, John Delancey, LeVar Burton, Data, the Borg, peaceful diplomacy presented as a compelling drama, and I already said Picard but I just have to add: Patrick Stewart. Patrick freaking Stewart. He is my hero. Campaigning against domestic violence, acknowledging his rich white heterosexual male privilege, dressing up as a giant lobster for Halloween, pretending to be French despite obvious English accent, keyboard smash-inducing speeches (what Hamlet says with irony, I say with conviction...oh my god, I love you, you pulled off that painfully earnest expression of optimism with such dignity, how do you do that), getting married by his bff Ian McKellan, apparently and bewilderingly not knowing how to play chess I mean what you were trained as a Shakespearean actor and you induce nerdgasms worldwide how do you not know how to play chess okay so rambling. But anyway, TNG has its merits, I just haven't gotten around to marathoning it yet and it doesn't have a ship I can OTP enough to binge on fanfiction of it which would motivate me to actually do the marathon thing. Side note: Surprisingly, the quality of TOS fic (on the internet, at least) skyrocketed after the not-particularly-intellectually-engaging reboot. Like, what?