By: Sarah

The thing that makes me happiest about the increased visibility of bi/pan folks is knowing what it would have meant to me as a teenager who didn’t even have the language to describe having crushes on both boys and girls!

However, one thing I’ve noticed about the content during Bi+ week is that most people describing their experiences are pretty smack dab in the middle of the spectrum. I was hoping to see more conversation about those of us who are significantly more “lopsided.” I prefer women (somewhere to the tune of 70%) and would not be happy married to a cis dude. Even though I prefer “queer” to “lesbian,” I would describe myself as being in a lesbian relationship. Politically speaking, my personal self interest lines up more closely with other people who prefer same-gender relationships.

I guess what I’m trying to say is the definition of Bi as “attracted to more than one gender, not necessarily in the same way or to the same extent...” fits me, but I feel left out of a lot of Bi+ conversations. It’s not that everything that has been written this week isn’t important and invisibility within hetero-appearing relationships and other forms of Bi erasure must be fought against. (Presumed heterosexuality is something that I experience a lot as a femme, and it feels like part of the same battle against Bi erasure.).

Hope this post doesn’t come across as dismissing the author’s perspective! It’s more a comment for the week in general, not this piece in particular.